sugar and spice. vodka and ice. that's what girls are really made of.


Tuesday, August 17, 2010

64. the great mall

This morning my new girl friend left for North Carolina already. She lives there.
I woke up when my uncle was about to drive her to the airport already.

I said my goodbye and went back to sleep and I actually felt sad.

Even for a few days of getting to know her,
I felt the same feeling that I feel when my boyfriend leaves.

I felt so alone again.

I miss you girl, you left your bracelet and make up kit here.

We'll chat soon and keep in touch.

On the other hand, my boyfriend was going to visit me today.

As usual, we had to fight.

I told him I wanted to go to a place to go walk around. He told me he was planning on getting a room for us. I told him but it would just be a waste of money since we're not going to sleep overnight there since he has work the next day. I told him that would be better on a Friday. And we were just arguing because I lost my temper again.

I told him I'll just go back home because the day was already ruined. I was going to get out of the car already when he said he'll get even more angry if I did. So in the end he brought me to the great mall. Ugh... well it wasn't the place that I wanted to go to but, what the heck right.... We walked around the mall and I felt bad for him because he wanted so many stuff for himself but he just couldn't buy it. He's been paying a lot of bills so much that only little money for his desires is left. 

We ended up buying Old Navy jeans wherein I paid for his :)

We went A&F, I ended up buying shorts but I don't know why he didn't get any.

After that I really didn't feel like going around because I don't want to shop anyway. I told him I just wanted to walk around and treat him to eat. We were at this shoe store, and of course I knew I'd end up wasting our whole time if I try to look for a pair that I'd like to buy. He was just sitting somewhere not beside me. Argh.. So I thought that I'd just do the shopping when I'm with somebody else. I need to do some quality time with my boyfriend since we only have a few hours together.

I ended up telling him, fine lets find a place to check in a room.

When we finally found a nice place (waste of money too), guess what? We were still arguing about stuff. HAHA. There was just so many things to think about. The money. The time. I wasn't just so comfortable because I need to go home in an hour already. I wanted to go home early because I didn't want to bother my relatives because there's a new baby and I don't want to go home when everyone's asleep.

Finally, we decided to sleep in for the night. At least we didn't waste money and we were able to spend more time with each other. Even though he literally just slept in on me because he had work tomorrow. Ugh... I wanted to be so pissed. I just got disappointed of course. But I had to give in and cherish the moment. I hugged him tight like a pillow. Laid my head on his chest, and forced myself to fall asleep.

A few stolen moments.

I just had to be contented... 
that's the most we could already get from now.... 
things were different.

I remembered back in Manila, I would sleep over at their place for a whole week or more. We literally spent the whole day and every day together and every night we were sleeping beside each other. I would not go home unless I was just getting new clean clothes. Sometimes we even fight because I was already getting home sick and he doesn't want to bring me home. He even once pretended that he sprained himself from basketball so he couldn't drive, just to not bring me home.

I miss my silly boyfriend with all his silly excuses. 

Now everything is just ridiculously silly.

He's so serious, so pressured and couldn't really make decisions solely by himself. He keeps telling me, "it's for our future you just have to wait and we just have to make a few sacrifices."

oh crap... why me... I already spent my whole life being heartbroken, lonely and loveless. Now that I found love, I still have to work for it? ... What is really this happy ending? .... When does it really "END"?

1 comment:

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